Isolation is a state of mind. It is an interpretation of our reality – a story we tell ourselves.
We can be in a romantic relationship and living in a densely populated, vibrant metropolitan city surrounded by people we call friends, and still feel incredibly alone and isolated.
Conversely, we can be wandering on our own through the mountains without ever seeing another human being, and not experience the corrosive emptiness of isolation.
Isolation is ultimately about a sense of connection – how we perceive and experience the feeling of being connected to the people and world around us. And like everything else we experience, this is dependent on the stories we tell ourselves – the narrative we create and feed.
It’s only by nurturing our connection with ourselves first – the self that lies beneath the rubble of our traumas and those we’ve absorbed from others – then that which we have with the people and world around us, will we be able to immunise ourselves against the feeling of being alone and isolated.
In large part this requires gaining an understanding of the forces that are influencing us and what we project into the world, as well as how we respond to that which echoes back. It requires seeking out that which lies buried in our subconscious – covertly and efficiently maintaining a prison within which we unwittingly reside, and liberating ourselves from it.
Ironically, prolonged physical isolation is one means by which we can achieve this. It forces us to sit with our daemons. It creates space for us to reflect on the connections we have and those we have lost. It affords us an opportunity to consider how we engage with the world around us, how it engages with us, and what we might need to do to experience meaningful, deep connections with others.
The fact we are being guided by forces we are unaware of means we cannot simply will connection into existence. We must first understand these forces and then release ourselves from their grasp.
There are many tools we can explore and utilise for us to achieve this, but if we can learn to experience the moment more fully, we not only make ourselves more immune from influence from our past, but are also less likely to form new limiting and distorted beliefs. We make ourselves more receptive to opportunities to connect and can to see the person in front of us more clearly.
To feel connected – loved, supported, acknowledged, valued, respected, seen – is one of the most beautiful aspects of the human experience. We must choose connection over isolation – both physical and perceived, imposed and self-imposed – as much as we possibly can. As we evolve, then so too will the criteria for us to feel connected, and so it is something we must work on every day we are fortunate enough to be alive in order to continue experiencing it.